She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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