just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I am in a vortex of obligation.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize