I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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