my room smells like sperm. sweet.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
