this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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