im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
