You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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