By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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