Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize