Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize