How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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