I should be sponsored by Trojan
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
