id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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