i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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