i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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