U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
