I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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