What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
