This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
