how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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