I hate your face
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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