and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
