We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize