Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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