I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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