Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Actions speak louder than pants.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
