I can tuck mytits in my pants
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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