She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
