Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize