I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
