So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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