woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
