He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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