I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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