I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize