Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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