Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
