He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
