so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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