Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
