People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Come share oat with me in your robe
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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