also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
