i think i have herpe
just one?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
