I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
