they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
