I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
