Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
