You're a womanizer and a bitch.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
