He asked to "fluff my boner.."
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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