So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
