Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
