..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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